I have a confession, Cookers. Yesterday was my first time ever making meat sauce from scratch. I know, right??

It’s not that it is scary or challenging. It is more because I don’t eat tons of pasta (especially in the years since I started fooding for real) and when I make a spaghetti dinner, I am usally being a lazy ass. It’s like the easiest meal on the planet, right?? A box and a jar, maybe some ground meat if one is so inclined, but it just doesn’t require tons of effort.

I can’t pinpoint what drove me to try it. Probably that I write a damn food blog, so I felt a bit phony looking at the Ragu™️ in our local market. The staff know I write these recipes. They read them, too. Whenever I go through the line, one cashier always asks if my haul is going to be a blog, then she tries to guess what I am making. It’s become a fun game we play. What would “T” think if she saw me buying jarred sauce?? It’s the same deal at the store my man’s sister works for. My groceries are the talk of the village. They’re not, but I am a classic over thinker who does her best to be no less than 98 percent authentic. 98 because let’s face it, friends, I am in the food and beverage industry, so its kind of my job to be fake AF for the benefit of the guest. Something I actually need to keep working on. My face gives away when I am disgusted with folks, so I have been challenged when it comes to practicing phony business. In my personal life though, you can forget it. If I don’t like someone, I am not giving them the time of day. If I so much as get the slightest vibe that someone doesn’t care for me, I am not going to bother with them. I had someone confront me about this just a few nights ago and use the word “fake” when referring to me and a past situation. Key word here: past. I will own the fact that in my life I have been a phony, but cutting people off never meant that I was a faux friend. It meant I caught a vibe or over thought something, or maybe they were acquaintanced with MFs I can’t stand, so I dismissed myself from their lives to avoid drama or to protect my sensitive little feelings. I don’t have time to play guessing games about relationships. And it’s also not my job to know I hurt your feelings, so just as I now communicate with people who matter to me, it’s your job to be grown and speak up. I’m good at hearing others and trying to understand. At the end of the day, we gel or we don’t. Simple. Just like this recipe. That’s how we got on the phony talk. Moving along now.

I want to get right into this and get on with my day, so no more “wrabbling.” I seriously love that word!!

I pulled this dinner off in about 45 minutes including prep time and baking some pull apart garlic rolls. The sauce is not sweet like the kind in the jar. Sugar is evil as far as our bodies are concerned, so I do my best to avoid it. Obviously I am not perfect when it comes to this practice, but I do keep trying.

Let’s get you set up to impress your people with real meat sauce, shall we??

What You Need:

1 pkg organic spaghetti

1 28 oz can organic tomatoes

1 28 oz can organic tomato sauce

1 Tbsp olive oil

2 Tbsp minced garlic

2 tsp Stevia (you can use evil sugar)

1 tsp Italian seasoning

1 tsp salt

Pepper to taste

1 lb lean ground beef

1 lb Italian sausage

1 tsp garlic powder

1 tsp onion powder

1 medium sweet onion diced

1 large bell pepper diced

1 pkg mushrooms cleaned and diced

What You Do:

Get your onions, pepper and mushrooms diced up and set aside. I’d also go ahead and open the tomatoes and sauce.

In a large stock pot, heat 10 c of water for pasta.

In a medium or large sauce pan heat olive oil and add the garlic.

Stir the garlic until the smell permeates the air in your kitchen.

Now, get the tomatoes and sauce into the pan and add the stevia along with all the seasonings except the garlic and onion powders. Those are going in the meat.

When sauce is warm, add in the mushrooms. This avoids them overcooking in the meat.

Lower heat to “simmer” setting and stir occasionally.

In the meantime, place the ground beef and Italian sausage into a large skillet. It needs to hold 2 lbs of meat and the veggies, so I can’t emphasize “large skillet” enough.

Using a wooden spoon or spatula, break up the meat as it starts to cook.

Toss in the onion and pepper.

Stir your sauce, Cooker. You don’t want it sticking.

By now you probably have boiling water for pasta. Salt or oil the water and add the pasta. Be sure to stir this, too.

Keep cooking meats until they are browned all the way through and the veggies are tender.

Stir the sauce and pasta.

Drain fat off the meat, and set it off to the side.

Finish up the pasta and drain that as well.

Place the pasta into a large serving bowl.

Use the pasta pot to combine the meat and the tomato sauce.

This is the point where you decide if you mix the pasta and sauce or not. I don’t do that until the first meal is fed. For leftovers it all goes in one big bowl, but you have to play smart with pasta. Get that stuff cooled quick, and don’t go reheating it over and over. Pasta and rice can be dangerous if not cooled and handled correctly. Do your research on this.

Using tongs, put a nice mound of pasta in a bowl and ladle sauce all over it.

Top with cheese if desired. I used Parmesan and Asiago blend.

Sprinkle with fresh parsley if you feel fancy.

Now, I do mix my meal once it’s in my own serving bowl because it’s the right fuggin’ thing to do!!

Twirl a nice big bite that will cause you to slurp and annoy your partner at the dinner table. Mine doesn’t care. He was over there twirling and slurping up noodles too. It’s kind of hot. The spaghetti. The spaghetti was hot. Wink wink.

I highly suggest some kind of bread to go along with this dish. I know. It’s low carb blasphemy, but you need it for this. Plus I’ve been running my ass off every night at work, so it’s getting used up. Trust.

I cleaned my plate before work and felt pretty fantastic all night. Carbs equal serotonin, the happy hormone. Maybe I should carb load and my face will quit doing that thing it does…

You’ve all seen my happy face and I’m brave enough to show you my “FBF”. That’s the acronym for “focused bitch face.” I don’t have a bitch face at rest because I rarely rest!!

It probably doesn’t look quite as bitchy as this face I forced for the pic, but you get the idea. It’s not cute, and I am really going to work on it.

Karl Lagerfeld once said that, “trendy is the last stage before tacky,” and while RBF is definitely “trending” it’s not a good look, Ladies. I’m just saying. I get it. I hate when people tell me to, “smile,” too. It’s BS, but they know not what they do. One of my fave co workers shared with me her feelings about this faux pas last week, and she’s correct. It’s sexist and stupid. You’d never tell a serious and focused man to smile. Leave us TF alone, too. You have no idea about our life or what’s on our minds when we aren’t smiling. Fugg off with that noise already.

Have a great finish to your week, and smile if ya want to.

Peace, Cookers.

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