Bloody Mary Pasta Salad

Well, well. That didn’t take long, did it??

What can I say??

The weather has been pretty crappy the past ten days and I’ve been stuck inside with not a lot to do but write and study. I’m so chill I don’t even recognize me.

There’s not a lot to share. All the interesting stuff I come across to ponder is going into the podcast vault to talk about at a later date. My fingers don’t really want to type or cook. It’s all about yoga and a lot of good reading.

Hand writing in journals is an old jam, and pulling fresh food from the fridge is new thing going on over here. There’s a new pace to life that isn’t all stupid “busy” and miserable. It’s calm, stable and fulfilling. Pretty close to bliss, so perhaps I’m finally living the dream. Sure feels like it.

EXCEPT when I want to shake my youngest dog son. He’s incredibly raucous and often disrupts our sweet and slow flow. Not gonna lie. I yell at him too much and have considered re-homing his ass, but that’s not me. Not today. Turns out I am actually good at committing to what nourishes my soul, feels loving and proves to be authentic.

Our dogs can be assholes and chaotic but they are loyal when they love, as well as being quick to forgive and move on. I understand them, and the more I learn to live in the moment; unattached to outcomes or desires, the more I realize the damn canines have it all figured out. They get up in the morning and the first thing they do is plank to down-dog. Then they go and hydrate and eliminate before we exercise. Next is feeding and then they show themselves love by cleaning their paws and giving in to rest. They seem also to only hold on to good memories for the most part, but our rescue hates ropes, so maybe they also hold trauma. I’m working on him. At any rate, I think I want to come back as my dog in a future life. They both have it made.

Exercise. Food. Affection. In that order, please. It seems Cesar Milan has it figured out, too.

That’s life right now. Dogs. Yoga. Solitude. The only things I’m working on are my tan, growing my hair and getting rid of this fluff from not running around a bar for hours a day.

Don’t even ask about it. No. I haven’t quit or been fired. That’s all I know.

This entire past year and a half has been shady AF as far as “work” goes and I’m not concerned at all. I’m blessed to have the universe on my side, a great partner and all kinds of hustle. Money will never be a worry in life again. It’s just energy, and it’s our choice whether it is abundant or lacking. I choose to manifest abundance daily.

So that’s that. I’m here to share this pasta salad because it would be a crime not to, and because I was asked for the recipe a few too many times to ignore.

I found something like it in a Tasty™️ video and, as always, had to make some changes but it is phenomenal. So here we are.

Why not just share their video?? Well, I did but my version is better so…

I mean, no I didn’t try theirs to know for sure and I didn’t do any blind taste tests either. Mine is better because it has more “Mary” type stuff in it (like pickles), and also, I made a tomato vinaigrette and styled it after my yummy Bloody Mary recipe. Which, by the way; we are back to talks of bottling. It’s just a bit of a conflict of interest in my sober state, so things have to be explored in that area of branding. I can’t be the face of a cocktail mixer, I don’t think.

I obviously am not going to be enjoying any cocktails (95 days sober today) but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss them. I wasn’t always the drunky-drunk girl when I used to indulge either. Sometimes I just really enjoy the taste of adult beverages and it is in my DNA to be a bit of a food and beverage scientist.

In other words; having a Bloody Mary on a Sunday holiday is something I miss quite a bit, (there I said it) but it’s the flavor profile rather than the booze and the buzz. Seriously.

The minute I saw this I was on it, and Father’s Day was the perfect occasion to try it out. I used whole grain penne, and found some “fa-con” to replace the bacon. The dressing is made up of a V-8™️ juice base with all the goodies to make it very Mary. For the next recipe, I will add in some sun-dried tomatoes or roasted red pepper for color, but it doesn’t need anything at all.

I tossed some of my favorite skewer garnishes in, like mozzarella and banana peppers. In the past I would have had pepperoni or some other kind of a sausage in there, and you better feel free to go that route if you are so inclined, my friend. My decision to be meatless does not mean I am judging others.

One thing to note. You definitely want to use the avocado oil with olive oil. Olive oil will congeal in the refrigerator, but avocado oil won’t. What this does is make the dressing stick to the pasta but not turn to a coconut oil or that buttery-type grotesque-ity (I like making words) that feels foul in your mouth. Trust me here.

This is a pretty simple recipe and with about a half an hour of prep work you can have this chilling in the refrigerator while you get your tan on, walk the dogs, get pretty or nap…

I hope any of the dads out there who might be reading this had a wonderful day and I send you much respect and appreciation.

Ok. Let’s get cooking. I think I’d like a nap. The storms have kept us all awake for three nights and life still goes on, but it’s catching up. We’re whooped. I’ll be enjoying a little of this when I get back up, FO sho!!

What You Need:

I package of pasta; cooked, drained and chilled.

1 green pepper, diced

4 celery stalks, diced

1/2 red onion, diced

3 dill pickle spears, seeds removed and diced

1/2 c bacon bits

1/2 c chopped green olives

1/2 c chopped banana peppers

8 oz mozzarella cubed

Bloody Mary Vinaigrette:

1 c V-8™️ juice

1/2 c extra virgin olive oil

1/2 c avocado oil

1/2 c red wine vinegar

1/4 c pickle juice

1 Tbsp horseradish

1 Tbsp minced garlic

1/2 Tbsp worsterschire

1/2 Tbsp sweet chili sauce

1 tsp onion powder

1 tsp garlic powder

1 tsp celery salt

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp fresh cracked pepper

1/2 tsp Italian seasoning

1/4 tsp paprika

Hot sauce to taste

I have a secret ingredient in my dressing but I can’t give it away as it is also in my mix that is protected so, I’m sorry your version won’t be exactly like mine, but it’s close and you’d never know.

What You Do:

You guys know how I feel about this.

Like, seriously if you don’t know what to do from here I’m not sure I like you very much. I’m just kidding, but I mean I’m a little hostile about giving directions for a salad. Like is that really necessary??

I grew up in a time where if you asked for a recipe they spit out a list of ingredients and that was it!! Y’all are spoiled and I’m not contributing to that mess.

The pasta is boiled and chilled, right??

The recipe calls for diced ingredients.

Put the vinaigrette ingredients into a blender cup or whisk with an emulsion wand. It won’t turn out unless it’s pulverized.

Put all that goodness in a great big bowl and mix until your arm hurts and all the bits and pieces are coated.

See why I’m not writing many recipes these days?? No enthusiasm for the details. I am sorry if I’ve let you down and if you really do need help putting it together, just email me, darling. We’ll talk it through. Kisses.

I’d let this chill at least three hours once it’s mixed up, but I have to tell you it was best on Monday, so I suggest 23 hours.

If you’re serving it at a party, I’d definitely garnish the rim of the bowl or individual cups. It looks too cool, right??

I still enjoy food and I definitely love you hungry Cookers.

I’ll see you soon. Don’t forget to join me on the podcast Sunday evening, July 4. It’s not live because…fireworks. All the soundproofing in the world won’t block that noise!!

I’m super excited about this next chapter and will shamelessly plug it every chance I get. If we don’t believe in ourselves, no one else will either!!

Here’s that link to listen…

https://open.spotify.com/episode/260mfVgWppGyt2QhKorWIc?si=xgzE42dSSjeK0j9HF3pAMQ&dl_branch=1

Alright. Lemme get some pics added to this post and get you set up with a recipe by Tuesday.

XOXOXO, Chelle.

©️2021 chelleonwheels.com

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission by the owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts or links may be used, provided that full credit is given to Michelle L. Clement or cHELLe ON WHEELS, LLC. with appropriate and specific direction to original content.

2 thoughts on “Bloody Mary Pasta Salad

  1. Can I just say I LOVE the sass in this post? Lol I’m a new follower! As for this recipe I’ll be saving it for a family get together. I can’t wait to give it a try because it’s unique and looks delicious! I’ll check out the podcast too, thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. OMGoodness!! Thank you, Samantha. So glad to meet you. I love getting a ding from this blog and talking to new readers!! Welcome. I love your screen name!! I’ll shoot over and give you a follow back, Homie!!
      🤘🏻❤️😘

      Liked by 1 person

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